Thursday, April 2, 2015

I'm a Boy. I'm Ryan

Lately I have come across a lot of conversation about how people see little people.  It's gotten me to start taking a close look at my own approach and also at how Ryan sees himself.  I want to share my thoughts and how I see things.  
My disclaimer is that these are my thoughts and also that I am only 3 ½ years into this so this is something I will likely have to revisit! :)

Dwarfism has so many different extremes.  Not many little people share the same health and experiences.  I have learned that my experience as a parent can be and has been different.  Our own attitude has a lot to do with it.  I'd like to think that I have created a happy and confident environment for Ryan, his family and our friends.  We are happy and it shows!

Now that Ryan is gaining awareness I tell him that he was born to be small just like some people have blonde hair, freckles, etc.  We are all different and this uniqueness has a lot to offer each other.  What a boring place it would be if we were all the same!

Do people notice Ryan’s difference and stare as we are out and about?  To be honest, I have never noticed anything bothersome - I make a point to think the best of any glance that comes our way.  They might just be curious.  They may simply think Ryan is adorable (since he is :))  Maybe they know a little person themselves.  
Everything is what we make it.  Call it ignorance.  Call it what you want ... but to me, seeing things in the best light is staying positive.  A positive attitude is all smiles.  Ryan has the best smile and he wears it proudly all day long - and that's what people see.  They see a smile.  A happy little boy.  
  
Do I fear the rude and ignorant?  Daily!  Like all parents I want my child to be happy and to fit in with his peers.  I'm filled with equal amounts of anger and sadness at these thoughts.  But when I look at Ryan these fears disappear.  And it's because of all we have done so far ... Ryan is happy.  He is confident.  He is shy.  He is social.  Ryan is funny.  He is defiant.  He is loud.  He is loving.  He is obsessed with cars.  He likes soccer.  He fights with his sister.  He hugs his sister.  He loves the park.  He sings.  He makes up stories.  Ryan is a three year old boy.

When I talk to Ryan about his stature, he simply states "I'm a boy.  I'm Ryan"  He's right.  It's pretty simple!

I’m proud to be his mother.  His dad is proud to be his father.  He’s taught us so much.  And I know he will teach many more too. 

“I’m a boy.  I’m Ryan.”

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